It's not like I really expected that life with 4 kids was going to be easy, but this is hard. Being a foster parent is no joke people. We have only had Mo since Monday night and I think I've reconsidered the choice everyday since Tuesday.
As a foster parent I really want to make the most of every opportunity to love on this boy. I want to teach him, mold him, show him about Jesus, love him like he is my own sweet boy. He deserves that. At the same time I don't want to get too attached cause I know that he's leaving at the end of January. But I still want to give him my best. And all the while, I have to take care of my own children. So when this boy that I want to love bullies my baby girl, I really struggle. He can be so sweet and lovable one minute and the next he's going out of his way to go shove Kins to the floor.
I want to treat him like he's my own, but I can't punish him like he's my own. If he were mine, he'd get his butt spanked. The problem is there is not a hierarchy of disipline here. The only option is time out. So if he pushes and hits its time out. If he hits me and spits in my face and then kicks me, its time out. When he's done it twice-time out. When he's done it 15 times -still time out. Thats very difficult for me.
The mom in me wants to love him, but the mom in me also has to protect my own kids above all else. I know that consistency is the key and eventually he'll learn what is acceptable and what isn't, and I'm sure it'll all click on January 30, and he'll be gone the next day.
So please, please PRAY for us! Pray for patience for me. Pray for a spirit of kindness and gentleness and submission in the boy. Pray for my girls to toughen up, and stick up for themselves. Pray for his mom to get her act together so that he can be in one home with one mom and not back and forth and here and there. Pray that he'll relax with Bobby. He's a little afraid of him, and if Bobby tries to discipline he goes wild with anger.
Its not all bad. He really is a good boy. He eats so good, and helps clean up, does his dishes, brushes his teeth, says please and thank you and bless you when you sneeze. He's a cutie, but the mean streak is staying alive and in full force.
Hopefully next week I'll have more positive wonderful things to say.
til then...pray.
4 comments:
I am praying for your temporary family of 6!
I know nothing about boys or fostering, but I can PRAY! :) Call Sonya, she used to be in the military and knows how to whip them into shape!
Hang in there, Jen! Your good moments will eventually outweigh the hard ones.
And he's two! About time for acting out stuff! Will be praying for perserverence! And he'll get the love you're giving his way, even if he doesn't show it back at times!
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